Oslo, Norway. Tall beautiful people meander about the city, wearing suits and milk-maid styled costumes. The sun is always shining. The sky is always blue. Out in the suburbs, lush green parks with rolling hills, rivers and waterfalls are filled with people, eating BBQ, playing ancient games of skill, and consuming alcoholic beverages, and making use of the robot cleaned electronically controlled solar powered public toilets, designed by Norwegian modernist master architects. Meanwhile, downtown, the King waves from the balcony of his royal palace, to his very happy mignon passing below. Beside the central train station, in a central area full of minimalist mid-rise towers alongside centuries old ornate Scandinavian structures, people openly trade heroin, and consume alcohol. Predominantly female police ride bicycles around the city wearing hot pants, have an average height of six foot three, and spend most of the time having a friendly chat with the locals.
Sunday, May 30, 2010
Labels: alcohol, Aqua Vit, architecture, blog, excessive wealth, exchange rate, expensive shit, fjord, Mandela, Nobel, Norway, Obama, Opera, Oslo, photo, police, tall blonde
Tuesday, May 25, 2010
Labels: bad, beer, blog, England, extended travel, innit, Kings Ankle and Sheep Bladder, lamb shwarma, London, photo, putwinkle, queen, rickets, schropscock, shoot, UK
London, England. A city where Lamb Shwarma is exotic, and rickets is making a comeback. Being Australian, and fond of good food, sunshine, and attractive people, London was not my cup of Earl Grey. It wasn't all bad in London, must see tourist attractions included Paris, the magnificent eiffel tower, and the Somme region of France. But seriously, next time I feel the need to visit London, somebody shoot me in the face. Either that, or just stick me in a cold dark room with no windows, a warm beer, a slice of stale bread and a limp carrot. Which, coincendally, was the Sunday special at the Kings Ankle and Sheep Bladder pub in Camden. London is best viewed, when drunk. London is the runt of the European litter. London wasn't all bad, but it was at least 99.9% bad. On a positive note about London and the UK in general, since leaving London, we have visited France, the Netherlands, Germany, Denmark, Sweden, and Norway. Photos to come as soon. Big shout out to London's West End Cameras in Shropscock on Putwinkle, they saved a whole bunch of London shots from a roll I did my best to burn, lest I ever be reminded of London again. Nah, London's alright, innit guv?
Tuesday, May 18, 2010
Labels: awesome, blog, charming, excessive wealth, expensive shit, extended travel, King, May 17th, Norway, Oslo, photo, tall blonde
Sunday, May 2, 2010
Muscat, Oman, the land of ancient desert forts and, dates. What? India? Nah, gave it a miss. Upon arriving at Bangkok airport, something was mumbled about "hello Mr you and your families will be requiring a visas to enter the countries of India". So, after a quick stopover in Muscat, Oman, badabing badaboom, we're in London, England. Yes, London, home of chin-less facial profiles, rickets, and other vitamin D deficiencies. Oman, one day, we will shall return. India, get your shit together. Pocahontas would not have approved. All my life, I have wanted to be an English Dandy. A refined gentleman. Today, my training begins. Northern hemisphere, wassup. More to come.